I got my penis stuck in a vacuum cleaner. WHAT DO I DO?

Question

I got my penis stuck in a vacuum cleaner. WHAT DO I DO?

Answer 1

get a life!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

Take the hose off the vacuum end of the cleaner and put it on the blow end and give yourself a b lowjob

Answer 3

same way as last time.

Answer 4

Count your blessings... if this were the 80's... you would be going to work with a Dust Buster in your pants!

Answer 5

Try something lubricating like soap. If you still can't get it off go to hospital, they have seen things like this before.



Don't use a vacuum cleaner again. At least you used the hose. Guys who take a more direct approach have had some very nasty injuries.

Answer 6

turn it on blow

Answer 7

The first thing to do would be to turn it off. The rest is up to you.

Answer 8

I've heard worse stories that were actually true. You might be surprised how common stuff like this actually happens. I've looked at case studies of guys who have had their penis stuck in all manner of weird situations. Probably most common is the zipper.



First and foremost, know I hope you understand that you don't stick your penis in places it doesn't belong (assuming you wish to keep it), and while I may not believe you and you are probably wasting my time I will at least tell you one solution - use warm water and soap. I'm sure I don't need me to spell out how you need to use it, the point is it'll loosen your dingus up and it'll come right out - well it'll likely come right out.



If it doesn't you have to call 911 or get to the ER. I would find it really awkward to go to the ER like THAT. That is just me. If you call 911 and explain to them your situation and that you are serious they can actually come to you and perform a simple surgery. You may need to still go to the hospital after wards so they can make sure you didn't do any real damage to your junk. All they do is stick your penis with an IV and drain the blood from it. It shrinks (temporarily) and it'll come out of the vacuum hose. All the more reason to not do this again if you have any sense in that gaping chasm between your ears my friend ;-)

Answer 9

something's gotta go, ur dickie or the hose.

Answer 10

THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS TO STOP TROLLING ON HERE



YOU might be a child but it doesn;t mean WE are.

Answer 11

Okay, how does ANYONE have "happy time" with a sharp METAL HOSE?



Just take a knife and cut off the hose a foot or so into the fabricky part, then let that dangle down your pantleg and go to work. Bonus: You can still pee through it.

Answer 12

duct tape

chain saw

jaw of life

chuck norris

Answer 13

Pour cold water on yourself and picture Rosie O'Donnell sitting naked on your fans with her belly suffocating you.